Let me start out by saying, I love her with my whole heart. Four legs, black silky fur, smart as a whip and the most amazing being. She is Jareds gal Friday and they have always been two peas in a pod. There is not a thing he would not do for her.
Now I know, they cannot live forever on this earth, no on can. But how do you prepare yourself to say goodbye to a piece of yourself?
Spunky started to show signs of aging for quite some time now. Her body has grown weaker but her spirit bright.
We started to notice something was really wrong right before our daughters palate repair surgery. We went to the vet and so began the first round of meds and the detective work to find out what was wrong. At first we though a parasite and thought okay, we can get her healthy again. But it was not to be. She started to lose her zest for eating all things tasty and needs coaxing just to eat. She wants to but she doesn't like her tummy to hurt. Every time the fridge opens click, click, click here comes Spunkers. Rotisserie chicken is her main stay (yes, our doggie has a refined palate and I will gladly give her what she wants).
At one point Jared would be feeding our daughter Myla by spoon, praising her after each bite for she did not appreciate the liquids only (doctors orders as her mouth heals) and I would simultaneously be hand feeding Spunky chicken praising her after each bite for simply eating.
There has been a lot of tears at our house.
It was during our last visit to the vet I started to let it sink in. And spoke the words, please help us during her last days so we know what to do. He nodded in understanding and I sobbed into Spunky's neck of thick black silky fur.
He gave us pain meds and something for her tummy to ease the discomfort. He did not believe she is in great pain but as we muddle through this, we want to be prepared.
Of course I asked him how will he know and he tenderly offered advice. At this point just prayers that we will know. We do not wish her to suffer (she is getting weak and losing weight).
But what a great weight it is to carry knowing that you have to be the one to decide.
But it is our job. She needs us to make it for her.
And so hear we are. Taking one day at a time. Soaking her in.
Spunky seems to save her energy for a few hours a day so we try and make sure she can do her favorite things...to play ball or swim; oh does she love to swim but then becomes so weak. We massage her body. Cover her in kisses. Tell her we are doing our best for her, thanking her for all the years, moments and minutes she was there for us. Myla loves Spunky too. Follows her. Always trying to give her a tennis ball, a treat, a pet or sit by her. This is so bittersweet.
For some who have never had a dog or pet...this may sound odd. But she took care of us.
Through our journey to have a family, job loss, sickness, struggles and triumphs.
How many people do you know that can comfort without saying a single word?
I believe dogs are gifts. They are mirrors of what love should look like. God created them and they are living breathing examples of patience (well unless a tennis ball is involved) loyalty, kindness, unconditional love.
They celebrate when we simply walk in the door.
They kiss our tears and try to lick them away.
They snuggle as if to say I am here, you are never alone.
They try to get us to enjoy the simple things.
They are grateful for their food and water (well unless table scraps are involved then they may raise the bar).
They forgive us when we are busy and are thankful and exzubratly so when we give them 10 minutes of our time.
They never hold grudges. Hmmm, sounds like someone I know who lives in the great upstairs...
And so who would have thought...my dog taught me how to be a better person.
Oh Spunky girl. These days will be tough but I am thankful to have them with you.
